You know you're getting old when your pill bottles start taking over your coffee cup shelf. I used to have just two tiny pill bottles nestled next to the coffee mugs. They didn’t take up much space, and the water glasses were conveniently on the shelf above them. But now? After my last illness, I have two more prescriptions plus iron and B12. Long story short, with all these new meds, I might have to get rid of some coffee mugs.
And if the extra meds weren’t enough, our national pharmacy chain pranked us by introducing pill bottles large enough to hold a donut. My teeny statin pills (about the size of this O) barely cover the bottom of the new giant pill bottle. Fortunately, I still had the old bottle, so I dumped the new prescription in the old bottle. Had I known the pharmacy was changing to supersize, I would have hoarded all my old smaller pill bottles.
But the proliferation of prescriptions isn’t the only thing that makes me feel old. It’s the TV commercials. Aren’t commercials supposed to get you interested in the product? I don’t understand what half of the commercials are trying to say. Am I the only one who doesn’t understand a lot of the commercials? Take for example the ad for Capalyta, an antidepressant. The commercial starts with a woman in bed in the middle of the street. I don’t get it. I don’t get the link between depression and your bed being in the middle of the street. Do depressed people feel like they are in bed in the middle of the street? Forget depression—if I woke up with my bed in the street, I’d be feeling confused, followed closely by panic and a desperate need to get out of the street.
Another ad I don’t get is Syfovre, the ad for age-related macular degeneration. What’s the idea behind smearing vivid paint depicting a snail, a sloth, and a turtle over the people’s eyes? At least I can rest assured that my age isn’t the reason I don’t get the commercial. There is a Facebook conversation of Gen Xers calling the ad trippy, creepy, and goofy. One person said the images were in their nightmares. Maybe that’s what the ad symbolizes – it’s a nightmare getting GA, but the ad is so creepy I’d be afraid of the medication.
And doesn’t it seem like a lot of the ads are for prescription medications? It seems strange since I can’t buy the med in the drugstore. Apparently drug manufacturers feel you’ll ask your doctor for the med if you see the commercial, but since they list all the nasty side effects, like nausea, suicidal feelings, and death, I don’t think I’ll be asking my doctor for a med that does that. And here’s a news flash. The United States and New Zealand are the only countries allowing direct-to-consumer prescription drug advertising on all forms of media. And New Zealand is moving to ban such advertising. Most other countries, including Europe, South America, Asia, Africa, and Mexico don’t allow prescription drug advertising. As an aside, the FDA does not review prescription drug ads.
I also feel ancient during award shows. It used to be I knew the major TV shows and stars, even if I didn’t watch them Now, I don’t know about half of the shows or actors nominated for the Emmys. I’ve never heard of The Bear, Hacks, Loot, Only Murders in the Building. I don’t have a clue who Maya Erskine, Carrie Coon, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, or Lionel Bryce are. The Bear takes place in Chicago, my home for 50 years, so maybe I should check it out. I feel like culture is slipping away from me. But then I excuse myself. It’s gotta be the number of TV channels. When I was young there were only a handful of stations. Now there are more than 50. No wonder I can’t keep up.
So, whether your pill bottles are taking over your kitchen or you’re baffled by the latest commercials and TV shows, let’s embrace our age with humor and grace. October 9 is Ageism Awareness Day, According to the American Society on Aging, people with more positive self-perceptions of aging live 7.5 years longer than those with less positive perceptions.
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